I'm controlling myself. telling myself it isn't worth dirtying my hands over tht fucking bastard child. As I'm writing this post, tears are falling . Im falling apart. And im here crying, that women must be fucking enjoying herself w her bf. I hate the both of you kay. I just hope and wish dad gets his house soon. Im so sick and tired. This place is so hypocritical . I cant endure this pain. Someone please fucking tell me what I should do to put a stop to all this. I'm so tired. I'm really trying to put off this hatred And let bygones be bygones. But is people letting me do that? Are they fucking giving me a chance and reason to fucking forgive them! They're making me hate them even more! It doesn't only count in one person alone to make all the effort. I'm so sick and tired of always being called the bad person. Who the fuck are people to call me a bad person when they don't know what actual fact is going on. Can someone really please fucking kill that bastard for me. I wished I could hire a hitman. I really want him dead and out of my life. Why the fuck is he always making my life so miserable? I fucking hate him. I swear and curse that u die a fucking terrible death. This years Christmas is the most fucked up day ever. I never ever want to remember this day. Is wanting to be happy in your own home so hard? I want to run away..

You can say what you want about me, but I am who I am, and that is something you could never be.